three things i’ll say in awkward situations:
*settles into bed with blankets laptop headphones a drink and everything* ahh yes perfect. I have to pee.
you know that quiet girl in class?
yeah she goes home and makes fun of you all on tumblr
when I was six I threw a tantrum because I wanted a slushie from 711 and I remember my dad said “I will never buy you a slushie” AND LITERALLY RIGHT NOW HE CAME IN THE CAR WITH A SLUSHIE AND I WAS LIKE WHY DIDNT YOU GET ME ONE AND HE LOOKED ME DEAD IN THE EYE AND SAID “REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE SIX”